Be That Guy

Be That Guy

Humble yourselves . . . under the mighty hand of God
so that at the proper time he may exalt you—1 Peter 5:6

Building community in the social context—in the context of our friendships—means reworking existing friendships into authentic friendships. It means dismantling false images, the ones we’ve worked so hard to construct. It means humbling ourselves in front of our friends by showing them our undisguised, unguarded brokenness—our flaws and failures, our mistakes and fears. Hard stuff, no question. What’s even harder, though, is that doing this often requires that we go first. You see, authenticity is counterculture. Look around. Few people live in authentic friendship. And so, when and if we choose to, we’re likely to be out in front, all alone . . . for a time, at least.

So why then? Why would we do it? Well, it’s only through authenticity that transformation-to-Christlikeness happens. It certainly doesn’t happen when we’re hiding, impersonating, posturing. It just doesn’t. It’s the way we come into the character of Jesus Christ. And, it’s the way we help our friends to, as well. You see, while very few of us men are willing to go first, most of us will follow those who do: “If he can do it . . .” So, when one of us steels himself and humbles himself, others follow. Going first is, therefore, both holy and heroic. Going first puts us squarely at the front of God’s offensive: healing the brokenhearted and setting the captives free (Luke 4:18).

Okay, so what do we do?

Someone must go first. Somebody always does. Be courageous. Pray boldly, brother: “If someone must, let it be me.” Among your group of friends, be that guy. It’ll be scary, sure. It might not go really well. But, that’s okay. We men are built for this kind of stuff. We’d wither without opposition. And it’s all worth it. This can be some of the most important work we’ll ever do.

Why Your Way Isn’t Working

The Bible says in Luke 5:4-5, “When [Jesus] had finished speaking, he said to Simon, ‘Put out into deep water, and let down the nets for a catch.’ Simon answered, ‘Master, we’ve worked hard all night and haven’t caught anything. But because you say so, I will let down the nets’” (NIV).

Think about how hard it must have been for Simon Peter to admit failure to Jesus. He was a professional fisherman, and he was good at it. It was how he made his living. But sometimes even the pros fish all night and catch nothing.

These are good guys, and they’re doing their best. But sometimes our best is not good enough, and sometimes there are situations that are out of our control. You can’t control the economy. You can’t control the weather. You can’t control a lot of things in life that will affect your life. You may have tried so hard but it just doesn’t seem to make any difference and you don’t have much to show for it.

What do you need to do? First, you need to get Jesus in your boat. In other words, let him be the center of your job. Second, you admit that your way isn’t working. The Bible calls it confession, and it can be tough.

Why is it so hard for us to admit our way isn’t working?

Pride. You don’t want anybody to think you can’t handle it. You’re in charge. You’ve got it all together. You think you can handle everything by yourself, even if it means working 12 hours a day.

Stubbornness. You’re unwilling to change the way you’re doing things. Did you know the greatest enemy of tomorrow’s success is yesterday’s success?

Fear. You can’t admit you’ve fished all night and caught nothing. You’re afraid that people will think less of you. You’re afraid to get Jesus into your boat because he’ll steer it in a direction you don’t want to go.

You may be doing your best in your job but just don’t seem to have much to show for it. You need to let go of your pride, stubbornness, and fear so that Jesus can take your boat and fill it to overflowing.

Hits home!!!!

I recently watch a show on Anderson Copper on the topic of “Bullying”.  After a tearful, heartbreaking, sad hour of watching it, I decided to talk to my oldest child about it and ask her if anyone has bullied her at some point. To my surprise, a strong, verbal, independent young girl, my daughter was being bullied. As tears started rolling down her face, she replied, “yes, they do, but I don’t listen to them”. As I can see her heart breaking through the very soul of her eyes, my heart began to break. She kept saying “I just don’t listen
to them”. As a father, my mind started racing. What do you say to someone who is being bullied, especially to my own daughter? As I sat there trying to rationalize and make sense of it all. I could see the hurt in her face and hear the knot in her voice. As I held her hand, she squeezed mine and began to cry uncontrollably. “You are beautiful and don’t let know one tell you different, I love you with all my heart, and don’t know what I would do if you weren’t in my life”, I told her.  As a father, I prayed that I had made everything alright, that what I said, changed her whole outlook on life and herself.  I searched online and this is what I found. Please feel free to share.

by Ruth Willms
“We can rejoice, too, when we run into
problems and trials for we know that they are good for us – they help us learn
to be patient.

“And patience develops strength of
character in us and helps us trust God more each time we use it until finally
our hope and faith are strong and steady.

“Then, when that happens, we are able
to hold our heads high no matter what happens and know that all is well, for we
know how dearly God loves us, and we feel this warm love everywhere within us
because God has given us the Holy Spirit to fill our hearts with his love.”
Romans 5: 3-5 The Living Bible

Everyone in the world has some kind of problem. Rich people, people in
powerful positions, like the president of the United States, the popular
athletic kid in your school, and even the person who’s bullying you. In fact,
the person who tries to bully you may have bigger problems than you do. Because
he doesn’t know how to handle them, he takes his anger out on you. Sometimes
bullies look so big and strong, but underneath all that show, they can be
scared wimps with poor self-esteem.

What can you do to protect yourself
from bullies and to help other kids who are being bullied?

Praying about it is always the first step. I’ve learned prayer works. Prayer
helped me as a kid and as an adult; prayer is my first line of defense. It’s
through prayer and reading your Bible that God can tell you how to deal with
your problems – like being bullied.

There are lots of stories about bullying in the Bible, but the one that
comes to my mind right now is about David and Goliath. Goliath thought he had
it all together. There was no way could an ordinary soldier, or kid like David,
could conquer him. Were he and his army in for a big surprise! David had God on
his side and it was God who gave him the idea of using his slingshot and five
small stones. It was God who gave the Israelites the victory that day by making
that little stone hit that small unprotected spot on Goliath’s forehead.

Don’t ever underestimate the power and ability that come from having God on
your side. In the Bible in 2 Chronicles chapter 16 verse 9, God says that His
eyes search back and forth across the whole earth, looking for people whose
hearts are perfect toward Him, so He can show His great power by helping them.
If you are God’s child, this means you! You may not always be perfect, but God
sees you through Jesus, who died for your sin.

You should always tell your parents or teacher or leader of the group where
you are being bullied what’s going on. Sometimes they can stop it; other times
they can teach you how to handle it. Bullying that hurts you physically should
always be stopped immediately.

It isn’t good for your parents or even your teacher to fix all your problems
for you because then you will never learn how to deal with people. This is all
part of learning people skills too. And it’s as you learn to handle your
difficulties that you grow confident and knowledgeable in all things of life;
that’s what makes you mature and capable.

Sometimes bullies pick on kids that don’t have a lot of friends, or look
like they won’t fight back. You don’t need to be popular or extra good-looking,
or be funny or tough to win over bullies. The Bible says, “My strength comes
from the Lord who made heaven and earth.” [Psalm 121: 2]

You can be strong and confident because you know God loves you unconditionally.
In the morning as you pray, ask God to prepare your day and give you wisdom so
you know how to handle each situation and problem. You have a big God – the
same one who helped David conquer Goliath. He can handle your bully too.

Going Deeper for Parents

We need to be available for our children and sensitive to their needs. Talk
with your child; ask him how things are in his world. Bullied kids can be so
intimidated they won’t even tell their fears to their parent or teacher. Ask
their siblings or classmates how your child is getting along with others.

If your child is being bullied, try to talk to the bully’s parents. Most
parents want to stop undesirable behavior in their kids and will seek help for
their child. But sometimes a parent will be in denial and become angry with you
for even suggesting that their “sweet” child is a bully. Sometimes they will
say your child deserves to be bullied, and needs to grow up.

We can’t fix every problem for our children but we can help them avoid them
and handle them in the best way possible. Sometimes the bullying only ends with
a move or when the school year ends, no matter what we do.

Build a strong relationship with your children. It’s important to teach your
children life skills and people skills so they feel competent and confident.
Spend time with them and know them. Know their friends and how they spend their
time.

Pray with your children. Read to them how God was faithful to biblical
heroes and gave them strategies to deal with their problems. Your children will
find new strength in your and God’s unconditional love.

Role play strategies with your child on how to handle bullies without
escalating the conflict so he doesn’t get hurt. Tell your child to avoid being
alone with the other child. Teach him how to get support from the other kids to
use peer pressure against the bully’s behavior.

Be your child’s advocate. Learn all the information you can by talking with
your child and with his teacher and friends and other students who observed the
bullying. Ask the teacher and principle for adult intervention. If they don’t
become involved, contact your schools superintendent. Don’t tolerate bullying
and don’t teach your child to tolerate it.

What about you? Do you feel like you can’t help your child because you are
being bullied too? Yes, adults can also be bullied.

The strategies I’ve written about also apply to you. Find a counselor or
mentor to help you look at the situation from God’s perspective. God says we
are to acknowledge Him, put Him first, in all our ways and He will direct our
paths. The action or responsibility falls on us but He is faithful as we obey.
He works it out.

NFL, Oh how I waited for you to get here!!

So today is Week 1 of NFL games. and I thought that it would never get here.  About 3 to 4 weeks ago, my brother-n-law kept harassing me day after day on joining in on his league of fantasy football. After much thought, I agreed to join, I had nothing to lose.   Once the words “yes” came out of my mind, I immediately started to panic. All these questions started fluttering my mind. What number am I in line? Who should I pick? Maybe I should do some homework and find out more about fantasy football? What did I get myself into?

As the day approached for live drafting, I did not know what to think. I had a list of all the player, positions and rankings. As the draft went live, my heart was racing, my palms sweating and my nerves a wreck. I had my wife next to me helping me with players, since we only had 90 seconds to pick our player, I’m yelling, my wife is yelling with excitement, we’re going back and forth as one team takes one of my players and now we’re trying to find another player to replace that one. What an exciting night.  I would never look at football the same.

Now the day has arrived and we are at week 1. How excited to know that on the first day one of my quarterbacks is playing. I want to say that I will be everyone on my league, which is about 10 teams, but don’t want to brag about it. lol

The league is something that I will continue to do and will look forward to fantasy football every year.  Thanks to my brother-n-law Mike for opening up my eyes to another world. Don’t want to exclude anyone out but thanks to my wife for the help and my brother Josh for giving me pointers.

God is a healer

Life!

I’m sitting in the hospital waiting, waiting and waiting for my baby boy to be born.  As I see my wife struggling and in pain during her contractions, God gave me a revelation.   Giving birth isn’t easy. There is so much emotion going on. There is  pain, tears, frustration, anticipation,expectation, disappointments  then relief, and then some more pain,tears, frustration and anticipation. A cycle that goes round and round. The best part is, when it’s all set and done, once you delivered and you crossed that hardship.  Life is born. Life is renewed. Life is given.  What has been birthed from inside you will be revealed.  Wow! Can’t wait for my baby to be born.

Hypocracy (proof read)

I know I promised that the next time I post something, I would have written something about myself. Lol Here is the situation. I always tell my wife that she should always spell check and proof read anything she writes, well according to my last post on blogging, IT MADE NO SENSE. Maybe, I should practice what I preach.

Blogging

So, this is my first time blogging and hope up doing a great job.  I kind of have writers block on what I want to say about myself.   It’s so much easier to tell someone face to face what you do, but to put write it down in black and white is tough.  I feel like I’m writing a resume for my own blog..lol.  Next time you read something from me, I will have it done.  Until next time. God bless

Caught in His awesome grip,                                                                               

Serg.